Success =

Alright guys, so I think alot about life, love, and money. Especially while driving or in the shower (I get into super creative mood, when most ideas come)..

Anyways... let's digg into these two questions for all us fastlaners. Warning: may require some deep thinkng.

1) What is success to you?
The 1,000 year old question. However, us fastlane folks see this differently than the 99% of the population. Success to me is not making enough to live comfortable after paying the month's bills. Success to me is... lots of money; I hate to be brutally honest. Money, family, wife, and kids. That's what success is to me.


2) What makes a successful husband? From a female's point of view.
Is it me, or has anyone noticed that there is an unspoken understanding that the richer your husband, the better job they have done choosing their mate? Family, friends, society, etc. will praise a woman for "doing a great job girl!" when they find out that their man is rich. Other women are jealous and in envy of them. Even women in families living slightly better than comfortable wish their husbands were making more.

Sister 1: I am married and have 2 kids and totally happy!
Mom: Well, maybe you coulda done better like your sister marrying a rich man.
Sister 2: Yeah, life is great. I am married, have 2 kids, totally happy, and rich.
Aunt: Yeah, girl, you did a good job. Does he have a rich brother too?

I am, by all means, not saying all woman are like this. I am saying that in general, it seems society places alot of emphasis that the richer your partner, the better partner you have. Which is all crazy, glad I have a good one now, and plan to get rich together.. rather than be rich already trying to find a good woman.

Simple question: Are you happy.

If so, nothing else matters
If not, see above

1) What is success to you?
Unlimited free time

2) What makes a successful Relationship? From a husband's point of view.
Honesty, Good Communication and Being Unselfish

Right now, i don't care about having a wife and kids.
My goal is to get rich (100+ mill) and i don't care if i'll be happy or not.
It's a goal i need to achieve no matter what.

I think that the only people who say that money doesn't make you happy are the people who were born rich.(And the jealous people ofcourse)

Well, moneymaka I see that you are really motivated to make money, but here is a question- Are you happy now? Without the hefty bank account? I know I am happy, even though I am not rich yet. Be happy that you have your life, and live it. Who knows what might happen tomorrow?
Last year, I was a day away from death, was I thinking about making money?-- NO. I was thinking if I pass, what have I contributed to my family, and the world. After the surgery, I was happy that I had my life. I was not a dollar richer, but mentally I won the lottery. Money is not the most important thing in this world. It is a reward for adding value to people's lives and working hard. If you are not happy now, why will you be happy when you do earn $100+ mill. You get to buy whatever you want, but in the end, its just a thing. It's funny how sometimes the poorest man in the village is the happiest with what little he has than the rich man who has everything.

Good Luck!

Lamboman

I wasn't born wealthy and having had ups and downs financially I can assure you that I prefer rich. In fact, poverty sucks.

That said, I'd like to have $100M but I'm going to be happy no matter what. With $100M a happy person can really have a good time.

Tony Robbins does an exercise where you go through and ask "What is important to you" and then keep asking yourself why that matters...

Example:

OK, so you want $100M, Why?
Because I will be rich! ...so Why is that important?

Etcetera until you get down to the root of what it is you value.

For me, it came out that what truly mattered was my family. Now I promise you, I'd prefer to spend the summer with them anchored off the coast of Cannes on a nice yacht to just visiting Cannes for a week but without question, I'd rather be curled up on the couch watching a movie with them than sailing that yacht solo.

So you must get $100M and you don't care whether you are happy? Really?

Having been rich, poor and various shades in the middle I would urge you to think that one through.

I have a feeling that if/when you have a lot of money, you'll have a change of opinion about this...

All it takes is one big health scare, a badly broken heart, not accomplishing a dream you have, etc to make you realize that money isn't the root of happiness...

Chuck- hit it right on the head! In addition to Tony Robbins, I've been listenin to some Tim Ferriss interviews and one example he gave was Thoureau and how his experiment with Walden was both a success and a failure, it is one thing to learn to be self-reliant, but at the same time you still need others around to keep your sanity.

What I got out of that is that you shouldn't strive for poverty, but you shouldn't fear it either as that is what keeps you from taking risks and also knowing what it is life to live without the "luxuries" in life makes them that much more enjoyable as you know you can live without them

On that note back to working my j-o-b so I don't end up myself in poverty and when I get home it'll be about utilizing my 5-9 time(something I have been doing an overhaul on in the last couple weeks) so that I can earn a living and ultimately live the life of my dreams on MY terms, not the 7-4 my company expects

Success and money are synonymous. Yet, money could never really be the motivation for the perilous depths of success. Successful men and women, put money as the last motivator in become wealthy. It's their current realities that plague them to push their limits in becoming successful. Its the poor living conditions, the 2 bedroom apartment filled with 7 people, or having a spouse who you feel she deserves more than what you have provided thus far. This the real essence of cultivating a future worth working hard for.
Being motivated to be successful comes from the struggle and hardships now. This is what gives the real motivation for success.



Any thought guys?

Success = To thrive not just survive

Read my mind buddy, happiness is hearing: "The lymph node we took out is clean, the margins around the tumor were clean, PET scan was clean, Brain scan showed 3 lonely brain cells and no cancer and as a result... you live and Jill doesn't need to figure out how the vacuum works".

...the other stresses in our life were relegated to the 'small shit' category last month.

Anyone who really thinks they will be happy "when" probably won't be.

The trick is to be happy with what you have while pursuing what you desire.

I'd be less stressed with a few more $$$ in the bank, but not if it means cashing in on the life insurance.

Overall...

Success is being able to look back at my life with:
... Pride for how far I have come from where I started
... Contentment for the value I have added to other people's lives
... Laughter for the silly mistakes I made & immature attitudes I displayed
... Gratitude for the people that stood by me through the storms
... Humility for all of this wouldn't have happened, was it not for a long list of happy coincidences, new technologies, supportive family, and a host of things outside of my control.

On a day-by-day basis...

Success is:
... Genuinely Smiling
... Having Healthy Habits
... Making Authentic Choices
... Writing a list of Important things to do today, and DOING them.

Just like being a fast-laner is a "perspective choice" we make, being a happy & successful one is a conscious perspective choice.
A 14-year old can do it.

__

[WAIT !!! ... There must be something terribly wrong with me.
Where is that 5-letter word that everybody thinks of when they hear 'Success']

Success for me would being able to do what I want, when I want. It's really as simple as that. It'd mean I have all the free time I want (all the time? haha) and have the money to do it. Once I reach a point like that I think I'd be "successful" but really I don't believe that means I'd be happy.

I believe I can be happy without being success (or my view of successful). Now, being successful would be able to amplify being happy (I'd imagine) but being successful won't make me happy if I don't find\not doing what makes me happy.

What if you don't hear that?

What if you hear.... "If you are lucky, you will have a year." or.... "I expect a good 3 months before your health has deteriorated to the point that quality of life will diminish."

Happiness is enjoying each and every moment for what that moment brings, without the burden of yesterday or the stress of tomorrow.

It is like the country song "live like you are dying"

I'm not trying to diminish in any way what a cancer survivor feels when they hear they are cancer free. I know that joy personally too. But, I also had a scare a few months later. We thought it might have come back, and we had to wait 3 or 4 days for the results. This go around was even more scary than the first time, because we knew that if it was back, it was going to be much worse.

We went camping and fishing that weekend. During that time, I found happiness at an even deeper level. As I watched my very young children play and fish and swim I pictured their lives without me, I figured out that no matter what I heard on Monday, I better damn well be happy and grateful right now in this very moment, watching my family in a moment of joy.... whether I got the news that I had 80 days or 80 years.

Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.

John Wooden


You can take the above to the bank!!!

John Wooden developed THE "Pyramid of Success" and it says it all. At the top of the pyramid is Competitive Greatness. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. Real love of a hard battle. Be the best when your best is needed.

I didn't read all the posts yet, but in relation to money, for me success is when you have the ability to never work again and do anything without worrying about money.

You have an awesome goal, it is sad to me to think that you truly don't care about your emotional state along the ride.

Will you also not care about others along the way?

I don't think it is the money that makes people happy but having money can sure make it easier. And I am certainly not jealous. I admire those that are rich and appreciate the work and effort they took to get there. And I am happy for those that fall into it as well; and pray they appreciate it.

Read the posts... (you'll get your required quota to start your own thread soon).

What is success to me?
Not making the same mistake twice.
Reaching goals.
Seeing my children accountable for themselves and to others.
Controlling what I can and leaving the rest up to God.

What makes a successful husband?
Must be my best friend. A teammate. Share similar values and morals (not all and necessarily in the same order as mine). Is responsible. Is intimately compatible. Can communicate with me. And lastly, loves me and wants to be with me under any circumstances.

I may think of more later.

ATW: You are right of course, actually while I was sick I went through the normal phases of a Bobo crisis:

Huh? WTF! Seriously? Ok, screw it - time to quit whining and fight this thing.

Whining never gets you anywhere, at least not anywhere I want to spend time.

I sure do value the comfort that money provides, I value the time it buys back even more but either I lost my mind a few years back or I hit on something..

Happiness is absolutely a choice. Nobody can make you happy (though some can make you miserable). Things can't make you happy, or at least keep you that way.

Ya gotta like yourself. In order to do that, ya gotta figure out what's important to you and work hard at THAT. The satisfaction of achieving the things most important to you can do a lot for your happiness.

Hmmm.. tomorrow being the free day on my diet (down 30 pounds from the high water mark)... I'm thinking pizza and wine can make you happy thus...

Mozzarella, pepperoni and vino == success

Never listen to me when the subject calls for a sane and rational response.